One Day When I Was Bored

That's candle wax, mes amis.

Not bad, what?

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Any idea how often I'm supposed to take this?

It's not quite clear to me.



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A Note about "The Unconcious Witness"

Let me tell you something about this book. Or more specifically, something about the cover of this book. Did you look at the picture? Did you take a good look at it?

Now, I like hardboiled detective fiction, so although I found the cover a bit cheesy, it did not deter me from reading the book. I'd been meaning to read a Dr. Thorndyke story since reading Partners in Crime, so while I wasn't expecting any incidents in the book to match the scene depicted on the cover, what did I know? I'd never read anything from the series.

But as it turns out, I did know.

I draw your attention again to the cover.

Among the characters in the story are a man and a blonde woman. That's about where the cover's relation to the story ends. At no point in the story does anyone wear an evening gown. At no point does the protagonist --or any other character--wear a tuxedo. At no point in the story does a woman faint. At no point does the protagonist--or anyone else--wield a gun.

This begs the question for the illustrators--what story did they read?



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What the--is THAT what I look like these days?

I freely admit that since I stopped taking classes to focus on my thesis, I kind of let myself go. This trend was not reversed when I finished the thesis, graduated, and began my job search. I stopped exercising. I stopped ironing my clothes or taking the trouble to put on clothes that matched (unless I planned to leave the house, which was not often). I haven't had a hair cut in I don't know how long. But I have nevertheless maintained some standards...or so I thought.
Today, I glanced in the mirror before heading out the door to a meeting. To my horror, I noticed that my eyebrows have taken on an appallingly unattractive pattern. While I've been sure to stave off the monobrow, and while I've remembered to tweeze the hairs growing under the main brow line, I've totally neglected the hairs growing to the upper ends of my brows. In other words, I looked vaguely like that guy from the Hudsucker Proxy ("He didn't look unhappy..."). As usual, I was running behind schedule, and I had no time to dash upstairs and remove or trim the offending eyebrow hairs. All I could do was slick the hairs down as best I could and hope that no one would notice.




In other news, here are the latest incidents:
1) In trying to scoop out the pit from an avocado, I accidentally sent it shooting across the counter and onto the floor, where it landed in the pitcher I use to water the plants.
2) Tried to make mung bean/broad bean noodles for the first time the other day. Thought instructions said to cut into pieces, then soak for ten minutes. Cutting the noodles was like trying to cut fishing wire, and I sent pieces of noodle flying all over the kitchen. After cutting noodles, looked at package for cooking instructions and realized that the instructions were to soak the noodles for ten minutes, and then cut them...when they're softer.
3) Have started eating persimmons, but wasn't sure which parts were edible. Read online description of fruit that said it could be eaten like an apple. Have been slicing and eating them, skin and all. Read today that the skin is definitely not to be eaten.
4) Forgot to take coffee grounds I've been saving to friend who composts. Coffee grounds now growing mold but can't bring myself to throw them out. Would put them in own small compost bin, but the neglected compost is now growing seedlings, and I can't bring myself to disturb them.
5) Landlord is giving us a new refrigerator and oven this weekend, which means I have to clean the refrigerator and oven in the next two days. More importantly, when they move the fridge, they'll see the piece of chicken bone I accidentally shot behind the fridge when I was chopping chicken bones for stock.
6) Mystery cuts on fingers of right hand. Am afraid they're the result of having old lady easily-cut dry hands.
7) Blood blister on left pinky toe from stubbing foot on banister.

Legume Day, My Favorite!

Must. get. motivated. to. find. job.

The rational side of me realizes that the contents of my savings account are rapidly disappearing. The used-to-student-loans-coming-in side of me says, "What's the big deal? You'll get another check in a week or so. Right? Right?!?"

Anyway, in other news, JLR and I are on a rotation diet in an effort to avoid developing sensitivities to other foods. So if we eat something from one food family on Monday, we don't eat it again until Friday. We're doing this mainly because we our diet had been consisting of legumes, fruit, oats, and rice. Since oats and rice are both in the same plant family as wheat (to which I already have a sensitivity), and since JLR has already demonstrated an allergic reaction (we think that's what it was) to eating too much peanut butter (legumes) over a short period of time, a rotation diet seems a good idea. I won't tell you what happened, since it's her story, but it had never happened to JLR before and hasn't happened since. And that's a good thing. Nothing gross--just midly frightening.

Today is legume diet. It is our favorite. Today, we may have: black bean soup; hummus; cannellini dip; peanut butter cookies; green beans; black eyes peas; or any other member of the much-beloved-by-us plant family. It's hard not to think about food all day when it's legume day. Or Lara Bar Day. Yum, lara bars...I've been thinking about food all day.

Sad. *Sigh*.

Last Post of 2008

Hi, folks! Let's see, what's been going on with me lately...

I finished the thesis. I graduated. I only recently started looking for a job, so needless to say, I do not have a job yet. ["Don't panic! Don't panic!"]

There have been very few incidents lately. The other day I missed the last step coming down the stairs, but the wall was there to hold me up, so no physical injuries. Just surprise. A few minutes later, I knocked over our space heater, and it hasn't sounded quite the same since. I'm a little afraid of it now, to tell you the truth.

I recently remembered that I have eosinophilic esophagitis, not just food allergies, so maybe I shouldn't be eating the foods I'm not supposed to have. I have a very mild case of EE, though. I think if I had a bad case of it, there's no way I would have forgotten I had it. I've read stories of other people who have it, and wow, I just thank God my case is so mild.

Wally is just fine. His digestive issues might be getting under control now that he's on Pepcid AC, which we have to try to sneak into his food. That cat. I declare.

I have a plan to slowly get my family to go on the same corn-free, wheat-free diet that I'm on. I'm not sure how much success I'll have, but I'm working on it. Mwah-ha-ha-ha. Hey, studies show that some food allergies may be genetic, so it's not just selfish motivations here (wanting everyone else to be on the same restricted diet). It could be that one of my parents suffer from the same sensitivities that I do. And JLR's already on board, so that's one down, three to go. Of course, JLR has good reasons to follow the same diet as me. For one thing, we share groceries. And for another, her health has greatly improved since giving up corn and wheat. And since neither of us could eat corn as children without getting violently ill, it makes sense that she would have problems with it now, just as I do. At least now it just takes the form of acid reflux instead of other, more uncomfortable kinds of problems.

JLR found a really, really good flourless peanut butter cookie recipe online, so we've been having a good time with that. And that might be why none of my pants fit me anymore. It's going to be interesting when I start going on interviews. I'm pretty sure all of my work clothes are a size smaller. Bother. I guess this calls for one of those exercise/eat right New Year's resolutions.

I badly need to do laundry, so today I'm dressed in the whatever's-left-over clothes. Please, no one come to the door today.

That's it for now. I hope all is well with you.

Well, boo.

Es ist kalt, y'all. Es. ist. kalt. And I just ate my last peanut butter cookie. I was going to save it for after lunch, but I was turning a corner. I still was turnin' that corner after I ate the cookie, and since the oatmeal I made for lunch wasn't ready yet, I had to grab whatever was available in the fridge, which was carrots. Carrots. Mmm.

But in other news, the thesis is almost done. Supposedly.

The Thesis

I hate it.




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Also, Wally does not recognize the end of daylight saving's time and has begun a program of plaintive, annoying meowing for his dinner every day at 3:30...right about the time the sun disappears from his napping spot on the stairs.

Well, Hi There

Dear Reader,

Hello. I haven't been posting much lately, have I? And I will tell you why. It's that darned thesis. I'm trying to graduate this semester, and I'm not sure if it's going to happen.


Morale is low.
Grooming standards are low.



Be glad you're not around right now.

Well, That's Interesting

http://shrinkster.com/12jj




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Why Not Pass the Time by Playing a Little Solitaire?

I'm waiting for a document to attach to an email I need to send to night so that I can finally go to bed. My word, so sleepy. In the meantime, allow me to tell you a little story about that cat. (No solitaire or jumping in lakes involved.)

That. Cat.

Y'all, I declare. That cat.

So, jlr and I were planning to make a lasagna to take to our grandparents tomorrow. I thought I'd get a head start on it before she got home from work by going ahead and browning the meat. So I got the meat cooked, and then, because I had noticed His Highness hanging around the kitchen in an interested way, transferred the meat to a bowl, which I covered in plastic wrap. I went upstairs for something and was up there for less than a minute when I heard a licking / lapping sound coming from downstairs.

I raced downstairs, and there he was on the counter, licking up fresh grease from the frying pan. I could not believe it. (Well, I say now that I could not believe it, but I seem to remember saying at the time something like "Aha! I knew it!") Some yelling on my part ensued, punctuated frequently with "Bad cat! You're a very bad cat!" and then he calmly sat in the dining room and cleaned the grease off his face for the next ten minutes. The next ten minutes he spent puking all over our town home. And then, of course, he wouldn't eat his dinner.

Of course.


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Avast, Me Readers! It Be That Day Again!

Ahoy! Today be one of my and jlr's (and especially jlr's) favorite days o' the year, Talk Like A Pirate Day! Aye, it be a day for celebrating all things pirate (but not all things really pirate, as real pirates be bad people deserving o' walking the plank).

Enjoy, me hearties! Be aye t' talk like a pirate t' all your buckos and mateys. Indeed, talk like a pirate t'all and sundry, and smartly!

I Was Right To Be Worried

Yesterday I noticed this big black spot on my ceiling, and I told myself, "Don't be paranoid; it's not a bug. It's just a black spot on your ceiling." And today? Not there.

And there's a spider on my wall.




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This Is What Happens When You're Lazy

See, when the Toadies broke up, I was too lazy to find out what the band members moved on to do. And thus while I've been replaying Rubberneck for thirteen years, I've been missing out on the Burden Brothers. Of course, now the Toadies have released a new album, so it's almost like I didn't need to bother with following what the individual band members have been doing in the meantime, but because I didn't bother, I missed out on this.

Yes, I know, I can still buy the album, but the point is, I could have been listening to it sooner.

But yea! New Toadies album (No Deliverance)! It drops today, y'all. Happy times.


(p.s. Thanks to John for telling jlr about the Burden Brothers.)

I See Another Cup of Coffee in My Near Future

It's only 10 AM, and I've already eaten part of my lunch.

And in other news, I recently found out that the new FOTC season isn't airing until January. Bother. And since I don't have cable, I'll have to wait even longer to see it. I'll have to wait until the second season comes out on DVD and T. buys it, then lends it to me.

And speaking of T. and FOTC, we had a good laugh about it when I gave him a lift to the train station last month. The train was running a few hours late, so we walked to a nearby bar to pass the time (him with sandwich and beer, and me with my usual glass of water). As we walked down the street on the way to the bar, T. started laughing and then moved around to walk on the outside of me.* We both had a good laugh over that one.

Guess you had to be there.




*See 6:41 through 7:03.

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Patting Myself on the Back

Y'all, jlr made a pound cake last night and left it here with me today, and I have not touched it, despite having been in the kitchen many times to ogle it, and despite my being very aware of its presence in the next room, and despite the fact that I can see the pound cake from where I'm sitting.

But the pound cake is for jlr's work, and so it remains untouched. I haven't even lifted the cover of the cake carrier to get a whiff. So proud of myself.


Also, is my air conditioner supposed to leak orange-colored, um, water? Not brown, as in rusty, but orange?


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Scary Google People

Y'all:

I was just signed in to gmail, sending a message, when at the top of my gmail page I saw an ad for on-sale Hello Kitty underwear.

And, looking around the room for the Scary Google People monitoring devices, I thought, ‘How did they know???’

Spooky.

Dear Pandora,

While we don't always get along, I do appreciate my Kinks radio station. I really do. But--speaking of not getting along--could you please stop playing the Who? Please. Stop it.

The Bike!

T. fixed my bike for me this weekend (you know, the one I acquired this day). He spent the weekend at his mom's house babysitting her cat, and he needed something to do. I myself have never felt so great a need for something to do that I would volunteer to fix someone's bike, but I guess T.'s handy like that.

Also, I think he wants someone to bike with. I have told him that I'm not getting up at 5:45 A.M. (as he does) to go for a ride. I am also not going biking when it's 100+ degrees outside. T. says it's cooler in the morning, and I reiterate that I'm not getting up at 5:45. T. also is mapping out a 14-mile ride for us. I have also repeatedly told him that I can't go 14 miles, that I am sadly out of shape. I don't think my comments are making much of a dent, though, even when I told him the story about my last bike ride. But at least his other friend G., who is similarly reluctant to take long bike rides, will probably go with us, so I won't be the only one griping about how far it is.

So, anyway, when T. called Friday afternoon to say that he was free to come over and pick up my bike, I thought, what? Company? But...but that means I have to brush my teeth. And put on deodorant. And pants. But at least my bike is getting fixed. Poor T. had to see me in my usual working-on-thesis attire (and accompanying coiffure). Not pretty.

Incident Report, July 25, 2008

1. Banged knee on desk.
2. Modem died. Again.
3. Cut finger while moving the food processor blade.
4. Mystery bruise on left knee.
5. Mystery cut on right elbow.
6. Mystery cut on right ankle.
7. Mystery cut on left knee. [When did I do all this to myself? What, did I serve as Ponyboy's backup in last night's rumble?]
8. Apparently, I acquired a tank top tan just by sitting at my window all day this summer. Sigh. I guess I need to vary my wardrobe just a little bit.